Movie reviews, for films new and old

There are many things that attract me to movies.  Surf's Up appealed to me because of its premise--when you're looking for something new and original, you can't beat a movie about surfing penguins.  Yes, there have been surfing movies and there have been penguin movies (any time something is a success, you can bet at least 5 movies will pop up to cash in on its success) but  never have the two been combined into such a compelling, heartwarming, and overall Oscar-worthy movie.

Okay, it's a dorky kids' movie with Shia LaBoeuf (Shia, I hope I spelled that right!) as the voice of Cody Maverick, an aspiring surfer who lands a spot in the "Big Z Memorial Surf Competition."  He learns all about surfing and friendship, and also the often-ignored lesson that winning isn't everything.  Seriously, more movies should tell kids that winning isn't everything.  In real life, the good guys sometimes lose, and it's not the end of the world.

But I digress.  The animation is fantastic, and the movie has some great scenes.  The one element I didn't like was the fact that the movie was shot like a "documentary," with characters occasionally talking to the camera, as well as brief "interview" scenes.  I was never a fan of reality TV.  On a side note, in this movie's reality, are there humans?  Why are they unaware of the vibrant surfing culture, and, indeed, the complex society that exists among the penguins?  If there are no humans, who ate Chicken Joe's father??

Hehe.  I've got too much time on my hands.  
Overall: 4 stars/5

Snap judgment on the previews (in 10 words)!
Ratatouille: Looks like it should be funny.  I always love Pixar.
Underdog: Maybe?  The cartoons were cute.  I'll wait for critics' reviews.
Evan Almighty: No chance in hell.  God-awful movie.  Pardon the puns!
Daddy Day Camp: Sequel; new actor in lead role.  Does not look promising.

Let me start out by saying that I liked this movie.  Kirsten Dunst and Tobey Maguire were fantastic, the special effects were top-notch, and there were some fantastic scenes.

Having said that, there were 2 big things about the movie that bugged me.  The first one: Peter Parker spent most of this movie being an insensitive, typical male, jerk.  Even before he was corrupted by the mysterious goo from outer space, he was not a likeable guy.  I can understand that he let fame and everything go to his head, but I hated seeing Peter being self-absorbed.  Tobey Maguire has this adorable embarrassed smile that we saw a lot of in the first 2 Spider-Man films, but we don't see that in the latest installment.  

The bigger problem was the story.  Spider-Man is fighting the Sandman (aka the guy who shot Uncle Ben), Green Goblin Jr (aka Harry Osborn), Venom (aka Peter's rival photographer), and his own dark side (brought about by this weird black stuff that came from a meteorite).  He wants to propose to MJ, but she thinks he's not listening to her.  Her acting career is in the toilet, she thinks he's cheating on her, Harry loses his memory, um, let's see, we need Sandman's backstory too...

There was just too much going on.  They had a lot of good ideas, but they tried to throw them all into the movie and none of them were really developed enough.  Too many stories, too many villains.  There was a nice payoff in the final showdown, but the very end left me feeling incredibly depressed.  I don't want to give anything away, but I will say that they could've ended it better.  Also, I'm sure a lot of the comic book fans were really looking forward to seeing Venom.  They must've been really disappointed.  Venom doesn't even appear until the last half of the movie, and won't return in any future movies (if they happen).  

Overall, the weakest installment of the three.  It's not a bad movie, but it could have been so much better.  

One comment, completely unrelated to Spider-Man 3: Cliffhangers are the best way to piss off the audience and get them to come back for more.  That is why I want to see PoTC 3.

As of today, all of my school projects are DONE!!  Completed, turned in, I don't have to worry anymore!!  And the weather is GORGEOUS.  Now I can kick back, relax, plan some field trips...

So I was actually doing research today (on the RTA website), trying to figure out how to get to all of the movie theaters.  I already know two of them--the Lake is close enough that I've gotten there on my bike before, and the York is right by EC.  I pass maybe a block away every day I take the bus out to school.  That leaves Navy Pier, Melrose Park, and North Riverside.  Navy Pier is fairly easy, I discovered--just a train and a bus--but Melrose Park may be more of a problem.  I don't think any buses go past (at least not ones I can easily transfer to), so I'll have to do more research on that.

And I'd better go, or I'm going to miss my bus home!

Holy schlamoly, this summer's gonna be huge.  Coming up:
-Spider-Man 3
I CANNOT WAIT!!!!!  Spidey, Spidey, Spidey!  Review coming as soon as I can get to the theater.
-Shrek 3
Eh, we'll see.  The first one was great, the second was still pretty good.  Can they keep it up for the third movie?
-Pirates of the Caribbean: The End of the World
Johnny Depp...Johnny Depp...He better not be dead.
-Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
I love the Harry Potter books, but I haven't gotten into the movies that much.  The fifth book, in my opinion, was the weakest because it was too darn long.  The movie should be good.
-Ratatouille
A rat living in the kitchen of a French restaurant.  The latest Disney-Pixar installment.  Obviously, I'm going to it.  You can count on me to be there for anything animated.

My brother and I are planning on going to each of those movies in a different theater, and getting to all of them on public transportation.  Theaters we're planning on visiting include:
-IMAX at Navy Pier
-York Theater in Elmhurst
-Cinemark in Melrose Park
-Lake Theater in Oak Park (if we're bored)
-North Riverside Mall theater (if we're REALLY bored)

So Netflix has this new "watch now" feature where you can watch movies on your computer.  Pretty cool.  Selection is also pretty limited.  Ah well.  So I actually watched 3 movies in the past two days, recapped here in less than a minute!

Johnny Dangerously: Mobster parody, could've been funnier.  Danny DeVito!  "Weird Al" song!
Dawn: Haunting, thought-provoking vampire movie.  Mediocre acting, otherwise good flick.
Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter: Dumber than it sounds.  Jesus does kung-fu (but not well).

Upcoming reviews (as in this summer):
Spider-Man 3!!!!  I'm pretty excited.  I also plan on seeing that one at the Navy Pier IMAX.  Whoa...

Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix.  I haven't seen any of the HP movies besides Sorcerer's Stone, but I figured I'd give them another chance.  Besides, OotP was my least favorite book--I thought it was too long--and I wonder if the movie will actually improve upon it.

Shrek the Third.  Yes, that's the actual title.  The original was awesome, and the sequel was okay.  I want to see how the third one fits in.

 

So I was thinking this morning about television.  Specifically, family TV programs and why aren't they around anymore?  There is no such thing as "family TV shows" anymore.  This is probably because the execs figure that families have 3 or 4 TVs so little Susie can watch SpongeBob while Mom and Dad watch The Sopranos.  And the execs are probably right.  But what's wrong with a show that appeals to the whole family?  I grew up watching TV with my parents.  Every Friday night we'd order pizza and sit down to watch TGIF on ABC.  The sitcoms were funny, and they appealed to families because they were about families. 

Remember "Full House"?  That was a great show!  You had the zany antics of the kids, and the adults trying to work everything out, and my whole family loved it.  I was very sad when it was canceled.  I LOVE "Full House."  And that wasn't the only one!  TGIF had "Family Matters" and "Step by Step" and "The Hughleys" and "Boy Meets World."  Then they starting getting weird shows ("You Wish" and "Teen Angel") and before long, TGIF was dead.  But I digress.  The point is, there used to be an assortment of family-friendly sitcoms.

Which, I guess, is the whole point.  They tried bringing TGIF back a few years ago, with an all-new lineup of different shows.  I watched it the first week, and it left me wondering, "Where did all the sex jokes come from?  Is that new, or were they always there and I never understood them?"  The answer is, of course, they were added to make them more "popular."  But the whole point of a family-centered show is that it's appropriate for the whole family.  And besides, the jokes weren't even that funny...

And today?  Not sure; maybe "Everybody Hates Chris."  Or stuff on the Disney Channel.

So...that short break went on a litle longer than I'd planned.  But Moni's Movie Reviews are back with a vengeance!  Or not.  No vengeance.

Let's see.  Here's a brief rundown of the movies I've seen recently that stuck out in my mind (in 10 words):

Meet the Robinsons: 3-D animation rocks.  Story is good too.  Lots of action.

Premonition: My head hurts from plot holes.  Skip this confusing flick.

UHF (DVD): Weird Al is my hero.  I bust a gut laughing.

The Stepford Wives (1978): Apparently much better than remake.  Very creepy, also very good.

Robin Hood: Men in Tights (DVD): Another laugh-out-loud movie.  Mel Brooks.  End of story.

Interview With the Vampire (DVD): Hot actors, bad acting.  Count the buildings set on fire.

This week's link: http://www.potterpuppetpals.com
A collection of short videos featuring Harry Potter characters, as done by puppets.  They have very little to do with the actual stories (meaning no spoilers) but they're hilarious!  Characters include Harry, Ron, Hermione, Dumbledore, Snape, and Voldemort.  Watch as they blow each other up, get naked, and burst into song!   Seriously.  If you've never seen these little cartoons, go check them out.  Now. 

Blah blah blah.

Moni's Movie Reviews are going on hiatus until after I'm done with my finals (December 15). In the meantime, go listen to Subject:Cinema.
www.subjectcinema.com

PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN COMING TO DVD!!!!
:-D

Sorry...I have just been so busy this week. Ick. My teachers all decided this would be a good week to start preparing us for the end of the semester. So hopefully movie reviews will be back next week.

To make up for it, some movie-related links:
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=3500287172002918684&q=%22weird+al%22+beverly&hl=en 
This is Weird Al Yankovic's version of the Beverly Hillbillies theme song, done to the tune of Dire Strait's "Money For Nuthin" (I want my MTV...)  It cracked me up.  The animation is very cool.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1OKby8aXoO4
More Weird Al.  This one is a music video of his "Ode to a Superhero."  If you love Billy Joel, Weird Al, or Spiderman, watch this one.  The song is set to scenes from the actual movie.

http://www.nbc.com/Heroes/episodes 
The official website for my favorite new TV show, Heroes.  It's about normal people who wake up and discover they have superpowers.  There's the cheerleader, Claire, who's invincible; the Japanese comic book geek, Hiro, who can bend space and time (my favorite character!); single mom Nikki, who has an evil double named Jessica; and the list goes on.  It's a fantastic show.  There's action, and at the same time you get to know the characters and really care about them.  "Heroes" is a reason to not hate Mondays (as much).  Man, I wish I had a superpower.  

Anywho, I'll be back next week with a new movie review. 

Ever thought that one of your friends might actually be from outer space?  This movie follows Arthur Dent, who is rescued by his otherworldly friend Ford, moments before the Earth is destroyed by Vogon spaceships.  They hitch a ride with Ford's cousin, Zaphod Beeblebrox, and Arthur's ex-girlfriend Trillian.  Along the way, they are guided by the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, a small computer-like book that has all kinds of useful information.  And there's a manically-depressed robot, Marvin.  

I wanted to like this movie.  I really did.  The cinematography is beautiful.  The pictures of space and other planets are fantastic.  It looks like a great movie.  Unfortunately, my opinion was greatly influenced by my recollection of the book that this movie is supposedly based on.  They changed a lot.  The plot veers off in these different directions and the ending wraps up too neatly.  The 5 books in the Hitchhiker's trilogy (yes, you read that right) were the strangest books I've ever read, and this movie was surprisingly coherent.  The books don't make sense, but the movie tries to.  I feel this was a bad move on their parts.  Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind was a great movie, but it can be incredibly confusing.  I liked it anyway.

As a movie on its own, it's pretty good.  There are some hilarious scenes and fantastic special effects.  However, as a movie based on a book it's all wrong.  They changed too much, turning the random adventures of Arthur and company into a movie with a definite, formulaic plot, right down to the love story.  The characters seemed off to me.  There was no chemistry between Arthur and Trillian, and the actors actually seemed very awkward together.  Maybe it's because in the books, nobody really likes each other.

If you haven't read the books, I would recommend this movie.  However, if you're a Douglas Adams fan, I would suggest you shake your fist at his ghost and go cry into your towel.

Well, I know it's a bit early for Thanksgiving, but here are some things I'm thankful for:
1. I do not have a television in my room
2. I watched this movie on DVD, not VHS
3. We don't live anywhere near a deserted moor
4. There's no thunderstorm outside
5. The phone is not ringing.

This is one creepy movie.  You'd think a movie about a killer video tape would be pretty stupid, right?  Oooh, you watch the tape and a week later you die?  Eek.  But every scene of this movie is specifically designed to create tension.  The movie follows a woman whose neice watched the tape with 3 friends.  A week later, they all died at the same time.  So, of course, what does she do?  She watches the tape, a collection of weird images.  A burning tree, a woman's face, a dark well.  Then the phone rings.  "Seven days."  But where did the tape come from?  She and her ex-boyfriend work to figure out the mystery behind The Ring...because the clock is ticking.

This is horror at its finest.  All of the usual elements are there, including the creepy-serious kid (actually, The Ring has 2 of them) and scenes where you don't know what's going to happen, but you know it's bad.  The true mystery behind the tape--how people actually die--is left a mystery until the end.  That scene was one of the creepiest things I have ever seen in my life.  I won't give it away.  The movie is beautifully shot, in muted colors that almost look like black and white.  It gives every moment a creepy, slightly depressing feel.  The acting is excellent.  There's an actual story, and enough nail-biting scenes to keep you interested.  And, of course, the twist at the end that makes "The Ring 2" possible (which I also won't give away).  

I've always had a love-hate relationship with horror movies.  As a kid, when I would see something on TV that scared me, I wouldn't turn it off, but it would scare me later.  At the video store, I'd spend ten minutes reading the descriptions for movies like "Carrie" and "Psycho" and then come home with "Matilda."  I only started getting into horror recently, through vampire movies (which don't scare me) and the Saturday midnight horror show  movies (which are cheesy, and some have even been MSTed).  So this was my first "real" horror movie.  I wrapped myself in a fuzzy blanket and kept all the lights on.  There were 2 scenes where I told myself I wouldn't look.  I'll be able to sleep tonight.  I think I did pretty well.

Next week: The Exorcist!  Just kidding.  I don't know what's coming next week.  Maybe "V for Vendetta."

Looking further into the future, Thanksgiving week will either be "Little Shop of Horrors" or "Silence of the Lambs" (if I'm feeling brave again).  The theme: This Thanksgiving, be thankful that you're not the one being eaten.
;-D

Quicksilver Highway is a mini horror anthology--2 stories, one based on a short story by Stephen King and another based on a short story by Clive Barker.  The Stephen King story is "The Chattery Teeth," about a pair of big metal chattering teeth with feet.  They're supposed to be broken, but the walk around on their own without being wound up.  The Clive Barker story is "The Body Politic," about a plastic surgeon whose hands rebel against him.

"The Chattery Teeth" was pretty creepy.  I don't think I'll lose sleep over it, but I'm glad we don't have any chattering teeth in our house.  The ending confused me, though.  And even though Aaron Quicksilver (Lloyd's character) is the storyteller for both stories, they're not connected in any way (except the teeth appear briefly in a museum in "The Body Politic").  Body Politic was not scary at all.  It's an interesting concept, but it's just too ridiculous for me to take it seriously.  The severed hands crawling around reminded me of Thing from "The Addams Family".  And also, these hands had voices.  There were no mouths, but they had voices.  They sounded like the little alien toys from Toy Story ("A stranger!  From the outside! Oooooh!") which made me laugh.  The special effects were obviously computer-animated and the whole story was just unrealistic.  Obviously, chattering teeth coming to life isn't all that realistic either, but that story was more polished.

Watch the first part if you want a scare, watch the second part if you want a laugh, and if you love Christopher Lloyd you won't be disappointed.  Though I wish he would have had more screen time.

Allburg was a small, quiet town...until 2 teenagers awakened the vampire who'd been trapped in the crypt of a church for 60+ years. The next thing you know, everyone in town is either a vampire or food for the undead. It's up to a teenage girl, a teacher, and the town drunk to take down the head vampire (which makes everything go back to normal, somehow). That's pretty much it. I watched it so you don't have to!

I really should just stop watching vampire movies, because when I do I'll inevitably compare them to Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and I'm always disappointed. Never mind the plot (which was confusing) or the special effects (which were well done but really gross), I didn't like the characters at all. Particularly the female characters:
Cindy--attacked by the vampire Zakir. (What kind of name is Zakir?). Turns into a vampire, but hates it, so she tries to take Zakir down. He kills her.
Cindy's mom--another vampire. Seduces the priest who used to sleep with her. Killed by Cindy.
Female cop--speaks out about how she hates the small town where she works, and thinks all the people are idiots. Killed by the vampires.
Lucy--the female protagonist. Screams and cowers a lot, and gets saved by the male protagonist (who is attracted to her even though she's 17 and he's like 35. Eew!)

And it's not just this movie. I've seen a lot of old horror movies, and the women never DO anything beside (1) scream/cower in the corner (2) get killed or (3) get saved by a man. And the villainesses don't fight either. They seduce men (or sometimes women) and THEN kill them. I'm not saying that I think women should always fight in horror movies, but can't they do something besides look pathetic and wait for the hero to save them? Nobody on Buffy acts pathetic like that, ever. Even if they can't fight, they try. Or they come up with something. And if someone does come to save them, it's usually Buffy.

Maybe it's better with new horror movies. I would love to see more of women standing on their own against vampires/zombies/psychos/whatever. Anybody know any good ones? There may actually be quite a few that I haven't seen. I hope that women action heroes aren't limited to Buffy or Kill Bill.

Next week: "Quicksilver Highway." The week after that it's "The Ring"...if I don't chicken out on that. Reading Netflix reviews with comments such as "I was scarred for life" or "this should be rated R" or "I couldn't sleep for 2 months" make me a little uneasy. I was the kid who got scared from the commercial for "Blair Witch Project." Just the commercial. So we'll see. And sometime in the next two weeks, it's "Godzilla: Final Wars." Yay! My free DVD from the Subject:Cinema triva contest (www.subjectcinema.com ).

Hey, I want to know if anybody's reading this at all, so everyone who reads this, could you please leave a comment?  You can post anonymously (on lj) and it could just be even one word.  If no one comments I'll be very sad.

Just what are Hobgoblins?  According to this movie, they're tiny creatures from outer space who look like evil Muppets.  They can control your mind, and make you live out your deepest fantasy...and then you die.  Do they kill you?  Or does your fantasy kill you?  Can other people see what you're fantasizing about?  Not sure.  Just one of many plot holes that Mike and his robot pals tear apart in their commentary.  The movie follows an idiotic teenager, his horny friends, and an old guy who works as a security guard as they try to track down and kill the Hobgoblins.  

I was very glad to have the MST commentary, because this is one baaad movie.  It made absolutely no sense.  I hated the characters.  The plot was just bad.  In addition to having more holes than Swiss cheese, almost everything that happened was either needless or pointless.  All of the characters are influenced by the Hobgoblins at one point or another, and the fantasies either involve violence or sex.  "So I learned from this movie that Daphne is a whore, and Amy was only fun when she became a whore."  Hey kids, it's fun for the whole family!  During the end credits, Servo interviews the "director" (who sounds a lot like Crow) and he admits that he is an idiot and wrote the movie when he was high on crack.  I honestly would not be surprised. 

For just about every Mystery Science Theater 3000 movie, you'll have someone saying, "This was the funniest one ever!" and someone else who says, "Even Mike/Joel and the bots couldn't help this one."  So my advice would be to figure out the plot of the actual movie.  If the plot doesn't interest you in any way, don't even bother with the MSTed version.  

This week's link: www.mst3kinfo.com 
Tons of information about Mystery Science Theater 3000, including news on what Mike and co. are doing now, episode guides, and T-shirts!  Plus "born/died on this day" updated daily.  It's pretty cool.

In a moment of weakness, Marian Crane stole $40,000.  On the run from police, she ends up at the Bates Motel.  After talking with the owner Norman, she realizes that he is trapped by his domineering mother--just as she is trapped by the stolen money in her purse.  So she decides that she'll go home the next morning and try to set everything straight.  Then Marian gets in the shower...and this turns into an Alfred Hitchcock movie.  

Marian is murdered by Norman's mother.  To hide this, Norman stuffs her body in the trunk of her car and pushes it into the swamp.  Marian's sister and her boyfriend hire a private eye to find Marian.  After he disappears at the Bates Motel also, they go searching for "Mother"...who died ten years ago.

I won't spoil the ending, though I suppose everyone knows the secret by now.  The movie loses something if you know the ending, which I did even though I'd never seen it before.  Still, the shower scene was appropriately jarring.  It's such a dramatic shift, because the first half hour or so is all about Marian, and then they kill her off and the focus shifts to Norman.  Psycho was such an innovative movie, for so many reasons.  Nobody makes movies like that anymore.  The score obviously adds a lot, and the performances are very good.  Norman's character seemed sweet and innocent when we first met him, though he becomes more creepy when you see him coldly wrap Marian's body in the shower curtain and watch her car sink into the mud.  And Norman's face in the last scene is just chilling.  This movie has a couple surprises to it still, even if you know the real story about Norman and Mother.

Fun facts:
-Yes, they really did use Hershey's syrup in the shower scene
-This is technically a "B" movie--it was made for under $1 million, which was cheap even back in 1959
-Hitchcock makes his cameo appearance in one of the earliest scenes, standing in front of the window by Marian's office
-Marian's coworker was played by Hitchcock's daughter
-Psycho was the first movie to show a toilet.  

This week's link: www.potterpuppetpals.com 
Two animated skits with puppets from the Harry Potter series.  The characters are all from the movies, but the stories definitely are not.  Watch Harry and Ron bother Snape! ("Bother!  Bother, bother!") and in the second movie, Hermione joins them as they come up with, shall we say, an innovative appraoch to defeating Voldemort.  And there's a new skit!  With live-action puppets.  It's called "Potions Class."

In honor of Halloween, I will be devoting this month to horror movies.  It should be exciting.  Here's what I have planned:
This week: Psycho.  Alfred Hitchcock's classic.  The Bates Motel is the only place where the showers are worse than the ones in college dorms.
Next week: Children of the Night.  I'm limiting myself to one vampire movie.  This one is about a small town plagued by an undead maniac, and "a teen, a teacher, and the town drunk" who try to stop him.  Hoo boy.
Week of Oct 15: Mystery Science Theater 3000: Hobgoblins.  I'm taking a break from the hard-core horror to laugh with Mike and the 'bots at a movie that's supposed to be a Gremlins ripoff.  Oh dear.
Halloween week: The Ring.  I wanted the original Japanese version, but I didn't see it on Netflix.  Anyway, the American remake is still supposed to be very creepy, about a videotape that kills everyone who watches it exactly a week after the tape is viewed.

And the week after that, I'll probably do V For Vendetta.  (Remember, remember the 5th of November...)

Hi to everyone who linked to my blog from Subject:Cinema! (www.subjectcinema.com)  Please feel free to comment.

So if you've been reading my reviews, you know that I like movies that are "out there."  Stuff that could never really happen, and I'm a big sucker for happy endings.  Crash is all the way at the other end of the spectrum.  It's an in-your-face realistic movie, basically covering the different racial dynamics here in America.  The cast is diverse, but fortunately it doesn't seem forced.

The general feel is that these characters are real people, dealing with real situations that are happening right now.  There are many different intertwined stories and all of the characters are in more than one of the different storylines.  Some of the scenes are really intense.  More than once I was on the edge of my seat.  I really came to care about these characters.  What separates "Crash" from most movies is the fact that there are no "good guys" or "bad guys," they're all just people.  They all make mistakes.  The most thought-provoking storyline was about 2 cops, both white men.  At the beginning, it seems pretty clear that one of them is racist and the other one isn't.  By the end, though, things are definitely more murky.  The people in Crash don't all live happily ever after, but the ending could have definitely been more dark.  I'm glad it wasn't.  The directors, I think, were trying to show how life really is for people without making any kind of judgment or statement about it.  For the most part, they succeed.  There are no answers, but plenty of questions.

Overall, I would recommend Crash.  This is not a movie that will make you laugh--it almost made me cry--but it will definitely make you think.  

This week's link: www.netflix.com 
No, I'm not being compensated for endorsing Netflix.  They're just awesome.  If you've heard the ads, it sounds too good to be true, but it actually isn't.  Pick your movies and have them shipped to you.  When you're done, send it back and get a new one.  Sometimes it does take a while for the processing and that (I average about 1 movie a week), but other than that it's terrific.  Their selection is HUGE.  They have everything.  Take a movie you're sure nobody else has even heard of...they've got it.  They have plans ranging from 2 movies per month ($5.99) to 8 movies at a time, unlimited ($48.99) which I think is insane but some people must watch that many movies.  It's cheaper than Blockbuster, they have a much better selection, and you don't have to stand in line! 

This fractured fairy tale follows the story of Shrek, a disgruntled ogre, and his sidekick Donkey, a talking donkey.  They are on a quest to rescue the lovely Princess Fiona for the miniscule monarch Lord Farquad, who wants to marry her so he can become a king.  Along the way they encounter a dragon who falls for Donkey, Robin Hood and his Merry Men, and tons of Disney puns.  

This movie was made for kids, but everyone can appreciate it.  There are too many inside jokes to catch them all the first time you watch it.  The soundtrack is great--including Smash Mouth's "All Star" and their version of "I'm a Believer" plus some original songs--Robin Hood's theme song and "Welcome to Duloc" (Please keep off of the grass, shine your shoes, wipe your...face!).  Almost all of your favorite fairy-tale creatures have a cameo appearance, from the 3 bears and the Gingerbread Man to Snow White in her coffin ("No!  Dead broad off the table!") and the wolf from Little Red Riding Hood.  The whole movie is just full of surprises.  The plot takes several unexpected twists and turns, but still ends up with a happy ending.  Special features include the "Shrek-in-the-swamp karaoke party!"  Hear the Merry Men do the YMCA!  

This week's link: www.badmovies.org  Badmovies.org has a bunch of reviews for low-budget movies, along with guidelines for determining how bad a movie is, just based on looking at the box, and T-shirts!  I laughed just from reading some of the titles (these are all actual movies): "Kung Fu of Eight Drunkards," "Barn of the Blood Llama," "Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter," or "Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death."  There are also reviews for several well-known b-movies, including "Plan 9 from Outer Space," "Manos: The Hands of Fate" and "Rocky Horror Picture Show."  So if you ever want to have your own movie-bashing party, badmovies.org would be a good place to find a bad movie.